Lies Preachers Tell #7

Do preachers lie because they apprehend the Doctrine incorrectly? or do they lie because the lies they tell ensure the contributions to their 'ministry' will be as lucrative as a lie can make them? Do they lie because they know no other way of communicating? Do they lie because they don't believe in the Lord whose name they invoke over all they say and do? Perhaps they simply don't possess the common sense to know the truth, even when it slaps them with iron- fisted gauntlet across the cock- sucker.

Whatever or however the case may be, most preachers do lie, and each most likely for their own reasons in their own time. Those who don't lie are usually milk- sops pouring out 'doctrine' of sugar- water into congregations of cockroaches. Glory be; hallelujah; and pass the mustard gas.

One thing these Protestant preachers are ever- fond of doing is taking a thing spoken to Jews out- of- context to apply it to Gentiles. To a cockatrice-- and in the sensibilities of his 'fiery' baby snakes-- I suppose this seems 'egalitarian' in 'spirit.' In a word: it's likewise simply a lie. One such 'derailleur' which every thundering 'locomotive' of a preacher pushing Protestant 'trains' seems hell- bound to hit in just such a manner is expounded by Christ in his seminole 'sermon on the mount.'

In Matthew 7:1 (et. al.), Christ tells the Jews-- who judged him unclean and worthy of death-- "Judge not, that ye be not judged." He goes on, in verse 2, to describe the judgement they shall receive in response to so misjudging him-- as we know, in fact, they did: "For with what judgement ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye meet, it shall be measured to you again."

Now, a Protestant preacher will tell all who will listen that these verses apply-- not only to the Jews to whom they were addressed, but-- to all men everywhere, throughout all time. But all men are-- we hope-- not hypocrites. If all were hypocrites, everywhere, throughout all time: the Protestant preachers would be justified in laying this finger on us all. Clearly, however, this would be the only set of circumstances which would justify the judgmental mentality and preaching of Protestant preachers. I say this much is clear, in light of the text itself.

Verse 5 of Matthew 7 reads: "Thou hypocrite [there's the target], first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye." In Paul's somewhat simpler 'tongue,' this means: "For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged [1 Corinthians 11:31]." In the words of the rock 'n' roll prophets: "Before you accuse me, take a look at yourself."

.As to the hypocrisy Jesus takes aim at in the first five verses of Matthew 7, perhaps an anecdote will best serve. I was collecting recyclables on my bicycle, with my backpack-- containing all my worldly possessions-- on my back, and a Protestant preacher exited a church along my route to give me a ten- dollar bill. Being subtle, he said something about "a pack of cigarettes." I thanked him, and expressed my chagrin that so many 'holy Joes' only judge one who smokes unworthy of any such beneficence. His response was to inform me-- in a scolding tone more appropriate when addressing an infant-- that I, as a Christian, should not be 'judgemental.' Therefore and thereby, this preacher 'judged' me as 'judgemental.' I later learned the reason he mentioned cigarettes was so he could judge me unworthy of further beneficences, upon discovering my 'vice.' Thus, in one short exchange, this preacher 'judged' me twice: once for being-- like him-- 'judgemental.'

Lies Preachers Tell #6

John Baptist (a.k.a. Johnny B) is an endlessly fascinating character, and that largely because of the lies told about him by professing and professional 'believers.' Across the river from where I write this, for instance, there's a 'Saint John the Baptist Catholic Church.' This, in itself, is a lie. If Johnny B were a "saint," he would be in the kingdom of heaven, after all, but according to the King, Johnny's not in. Jesus said, "he that is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than [Johnny B]." (Matthew 11:11)

In Matthew 14 and Mark 6, the story of John Baptist's demise is recorded. Matthew tells a "little white lie" about this event when, in 14:3, he writes, "Herod had laid hold on John, and bound him, and put him in prison for Herodias' sake, his brother Philip's wife." This is a lie inasmuch as, by the time Johnny was imprisoned, Herodias was Herod's wife: not Philip's. Mark records this "little white lie" as being first told by Johnny B, writing in 6:18 "John had said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have thy brother's wife."

Understand: Johnny's usage of the term "lawful" indicates the subject of conversation was law; and exactly because he was arguing law, his calling Herodias Philip's wife is a lie. That is to say, it's a legal perversion. According to law, Herodias could not be referred to as Philip's wife because Herod already had her. Deuteronomy 24:1 & 4 sets the legal bar in such cases thusly: "When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house." And, "Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife..." This means she could never legally be Philip's wife, again. To state it another way: Johnny B broke the law referring to Herodias as Philip's wife-- a thing she was no longer and could never legally be, again.

Nowhere in scripture are we informed as to how Philip's marriage to Herodias ended, but we can assume it was ended by either death or divorce. Either way, the spirit of the law remains the same, even if the letter changes. Preachers are quick to lie for Johnny B in applauding his misunderstanding of law as a firm grasp of the same, but the truth is: Johnny was wrong. It was precisely right for Herod to marry Herodias: and that according to the law. It was, In fact, even his legal duty as Philip's brother: by the spirit of the law, in the case of divorce; or by the letter of the law, in the case of death. Deuteronomy 25:5 plainly says, "If brethren dwell together, and one of them die, and have no child, the wife of the dead shall not marry without unto a stranger: her husband's brother shall go in unto her, and take her to him to wife, and perform the duty of an husband's brother unto her."

As stated above, if Philip's marriage to Herodias ended-- as it seems most likely to have-- in divorce, then Herod was under no legal obligation to marry Herodias. However, this would mean his marrying her was more laudable than if it had been obligatory, being as it was certainly in keeping with the spirit of the law; not an obligation to the letter of the same. As the apostle Paul wrote: "the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life." (2 Corinthians 3:6) Johnny B should have applauded king Herod's legal acumen and obedient temperament; not rebuked him as a perverter of law. Johnny B was simply perverting law, and therefore wrong. Preachers who say otherwise lie and pervert law like Johnny B.

In Proverbs 18:21, Solomon wrote, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof." Johnny B's life and death bear this out, inasmuch as it was Johnny who-- with the same mouth that made his living-- pronounced death on the Son of God by calling him "the Lamb of God;" and Johnny who ultimately pronounced death on himself when he called Herod's marriage a perversion of law. "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder."